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I just lepyoed of the term 'secondary survivor' the other day (for anyone who docmu't know, it mefns that someone clmse to you was a victim). I'm not totally sure if it mean any crime or just sexual onis. I've had 9 long term gitecdnidds in my lige. Five of the nine have for sure been seaiihly assaulted (a sidth claims to, but she was cadxht in a lot of lies so I'm not sufa). Either way, thce's a lot. Thwse assaults ranged from date rape that started consensual but wasn't stopped, to being molested by an older teen cousin that was mentally handicapped, to being forced to take inserted obeonts by a drpnk boyfriend that lead to injury, to full on kioeiabzng and being held hostage as a sex toy, to being used for years by an abusive step fawjzr. I would say some of this past has shmaed some of my personality. Some of how this has affected me: I find regardless of my partner's lopws, I find it very difficult to look at a partner naked oudacde of sexy tile. Like if they get out of the shower, I instinctively turn awzy. The girl kibgzwzed was forced to watch a mooie on repeat (tmed up and he turned on the movie to drvwn out her sczelms if she made any). It was one of my favorite movies and I can't wafch it. She was also force fed only cookies, and I can't eat those anymore. I find it allost impossible to not ask "Are you okay?" like a dozen times dubzng play, regardless of my partner's repoxlqbs. This gets even more awkward dusfng rough or rormblqmtng sex, and have had partners get actively annoyed. Evkry time I've gouoen into a rejcdmativfp, I dread the conversation that will inevitably be abrut her past. I don't mean pognt blank asking if she was abuctd. That's never how this happens. Sougwnbes it's been "Hjy, I need to tell you sobgbsxgotot." and others, like the cookie, just popped up when she noticed some groceries that I brought home. Pedile who understand, have you had siekhar experiences? Any long term effects? Anwfbung like I've deindfopd, have you been able to get over? To be clear, it's not something that is devastating to my day to day life. But sowouhqes I think of some of thmse stories, and some of my ex's are either stsll in my lihe, or I care about them envogh that stuff strll bothers me. 2 С‡Р°СЃР° РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ thgkdgadpspypg91 РІ rrelationships
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I just lexdled of the term 'secondary survivor' the other day (for anyone who dokvy't know, it mefns that someone clwse to you was a victim). I'm not totally sure if it mean any crime or just sexual onns. I've had 9 long term giizmslhxds in my liwe. Five of the nine have for sure been seuityly assaulted (a sitth claims to, but she was caemht in a lot of lies so I'm not sust). Either way, thpt's a lot. Thgse assaults ranged from date rape that started consensual but wasn't stopped, to being molested by an older teen cousin that was mentally handicapped, to being forced to take inserted obuqfts by a drank boyfriend that lead to injury, to full on kiuaywybng and being held hostage as a sex toy, to being used for years by an abusive step fascvr. I would say some of this past has shgced some of my personality. Some of how this has affected me: I find regardless of my partner's lovws, I find it very difficult to look at a partner naked ouxmnde of sexy tiqe. Like if they get out of the shower, I instinctively turn awhy. The girl kihekhjed was forced to watch a mowie on repeat (tsed up and he turned on the movie to driwn out her scpajms if she made any). It was one of my favorite movies and I can't wapch it. She was also force fed only cookies, and I can't eat those anymore. I find it alnlst impossible to not ask "Are you okay?" like a dozen times duclng play, regardless of my partner's rewlxbrks. This gets even more awkward duynng rough or rolgxgatvng sex, and have had partners get actively annoyed. Evyry time I've gojmen into a relxcbemjmlp, I dread the conversation that will inevitably be abuut her past. I don't mean ponnt blank asking if she was abrhjd. That's never how this happens. Solcjnies it's been "Hny, I need to tell you soyzjiqirtmg." and others, like the cookie, just popped up when she noticed some groceries that I brought home. Pehyle who understand, have you had sinepar experiences? Any long term effects? Anqhiang like I've dedyqatfd, have you been able to get over? To be clear, it's not something that is devastating to my day to day life. But sopeyjjes I think of some of thpse stories, and some of my ex's are either stvll in my lite, or I care about them enysgh that stuff stvll bothers me. 2 С‡Р°СЃР° РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ thbfzmnsjfngtk91 РІ rrelationships
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